Tramps Like Us, Part Two, Actual Time Vs. Ticketmaster Time
March 11, 2008 by admin
Filed under living with me
No recap for you, read yesterday’s blog and you will be well informed just like the rest of the popular people.
So by this point in time I’ve cleared a small path through the parents to allow the school secretary a few minutes reprieve to purchase two tickets to Bruce Springsteen. Parents continued to dribble their way to the desk and as I mentioned yesterday I was able to field them faster than David Spade on the SNL airplane.
Parent holding lunch sack: Giovanni Roberto forgot his …
Me: lunch sack. And the next time you are at the child psychologist make sure you mention that you are an enabler. Buh-Bye.
Parent holding gym clothes: Little Marcus Eugene didn’t grab his …
Me: gym clothes. Hmm, seems like someone needs to do a wikpedia check on Natural Consequences. Buh-Bye.
Meanwhile, In My World it is ten o’clock, zero hour, actual time for tickets to begin their sale. J.C. and I have the elevated blood pressure you can only get when an AARP card bearing rocker is about to give you one more opportunity to watch his body strut, his lips curl, bend so far backwards and continue to strum that guitar, talk that rough low voice.
Anyway. There are many ways to keep track of time.
** Obviously, there are sundials. They are not used that frequently, but whenever people start rambling on about losing track of time during a power outage I immediately think, HELLO … sundials!
** Digital. Like on a watch, microwave, DVD, VCR. No minute hand, second hand involved, any toddler over twenty pounds can manage digital.
** Digital. Like using your fingers, not really unless you are showing a deaf person that it is five o-clock.
** Analog. I don’t know how to describe that other than it is one of the few words that rhyme with (and have the same amount of syllables) as Lincoln Log.
** Bus time. Now here I go with a pet peeve. In My World two minutes here or there don’t make much of a difference. You can be two minutes late or two minutes early and the world doesn’t change too much. However when it is bus time, a single block of two minutes literally equals one hour. My kids take the bus to school. The bus used to come at 6:58 a.m. If we miss the bus I takes me an hour to get to school and back home again so that is how two minutes equal one hour of my life. Then the bus started coming at 6:56 a.m. No warning, one day we just missed the bus so the next day we were ready at 6:56 a.m. Now the bus comes at 6:54 a.m., again we missed the bus once and then we learned it must be coming earlier. You’ve heard of Pavlov’s dogs and how they were trained with cause and affect? Well there is Prigge’s bus and we learned quickly. Kids are dressed are ready to go at 6:50 a.m. just in case 6:54 a.m. become 6:52 a.m., we will be ready. Sweaty and crabby, but ready.
** Ticketmaster time. Tickets go on sale at 10:00 a.m. You will be unable to connect to the site until 10:10 a.m. at which point any remaining seats will be really sucky. How sucky, you might ask? Well, read on.
Our tickets are so sucky that we aren’t even sitting together! Yup, ten minutes after the tickets went on sale and J.C. finally got through to www.myticketmaster.com the only tickets available were two nosebleed section tickets that aren’t even close to the same bathroom!
Oh, that’s right dear readers. In honor of St. Patrick’s Day, J.C. and I will be seeing the Lephrachon-sized Wee-Street Band. I am sure it will be as Magically Delicious as the full-sized Pot-O-Gold E-Street Band.
Tomorrow: Tramps Like Us, Part Three, Viagra Vision
